Communion: The Female Search for Love

Heterosexism refers to discrimination or bias against nonheterosexual individuals, rooted in the assumption that heterosexuality is the default or superior form of sexual orientation. hooks examines the role that heterosexism plays in the oppression of both women and queer people. hooks takes the definition further than the dictionary explanation, illustrating how heterosexism makes “the only commitments that are deemed truly acceptable and worthy are those between straight women and men who marry” (209). Heterosexism limits the expression of love to between heterosexual married people, which hooks pushes back against. hooks encourages the development of love in romantic relationships, but also friendships and broader communities. While heterosexism only values the love between heterosexual people, hooks values and places emphasis on the importance and meaning of love between people of all genders and sexualities, love she encourages her audience to pursue.

Misogyny is a deep-seated prejudice, distrust, or hostility toward women, often manifesting in discrimination, devaluation, and systemic oppression. Misogyny is what feminism seeks to combat, and hooks evaluates the role of misogyny in the cultural perception of love as it relates to women. Because women are perceived by society as more capable of love, according to hooks, love is denigrated as a sign of weakness or emotional instability. Misogyny makes women move away from love in order to find power and success in patriarchal systems. Misogyny goes hand-in-hand with patriarchy, as the hatred of women motivates men to put themselves in power over the women they view as their inferiors. hooks dismantles a number of misogynistic beliefs throughout Communion, including the idea that gendered differences make men or women more or less capable of caregiving, nurturing, or loving others. She reminds her audience that all people, regardless of their gender, are capable of loving if they put in the work and effort.

Patriarchy is a social structure in which men hold primary power, often maintaining authority over women and children in familial, legal, and societal contexts. hooks introduces patriarchy through the lens of her experience growing up with a patriarchal father who ruled over hooks, her mother, and her siblings with cruelty. Her father’s patriarchal behavior sowed a distrust of men that was only rectified by her grandfather’s antipatriarchal behavior, as he supported hooks’s grandmother’s power in their home. hooks broadens the definition of patriarchy to a societal level, illustrating how men have more power and control in society at large. hooks examines the role that patriarchy plays in women’s journey towards finding love. hooks reiterates throughout Communion that love cannot exist in the arms of patriarchy, as patriarchy is an inherently oppressive and unequal system and love requires mutuality and equality.